20 | October | 2015 | Kate's Bookshelf

Merde, où ai-je mis mon journal sacrément sanglante de Dieu!

Okay, so for all of you that read French, pardonnez-moi. It’s much more fun to swear in French and doesn’t look so bad. For those that do not read French, I just said a couple les cinq lettres (swear words). I was actually trying to be even a bit more crass, but translating slang and swear words into French doesn’t come out clearly for me even though I have the book Merde! by Genevieve. I picked up on a lark years ago when I was teaching myself French. I thought I needed to know slang. I was wrong.

But moving on. Living in a ranching area, I have picked up my fair share of swearing. Goddammitt spits out of my mouth a few too many times along with sh*t and d*mn, and h*ll and such. There are certain words I won’t use, though recently this summer, I did let an F-bomb slip out when I was talking to a guy that uses the word frequently. I did use it to make a point in the discussion we were having. I swear a bit too much for being a lady, but sometimes when you are surrounded by it, it’s very easy to let it all out.

But swearing is not ladylike at all. It’s not even that cool. It’s not very gentlemanly either, but that is another whole post. One thing that I strive to be is ladylike. Oh sure, sometimes I want to be a little less feminine and get down and dirty and not have to worry about how I’m standing and whatnot, but for the most part I like being a lady.

And part of being a lady is having a clean mouth. Speaking in a feminine way and not swearing. There is a reason there is the expression of “swear like a sailor”. But a lady should not do that.

Boris doesn’t tolerate swearing and it’s one of the things I love about him. I used to inwardly mock him about it because I would let out a word here or there, but after speaking with several guys around here that let out the F-word all the time, along with various adaptations of that and other words I would rather not hear and usually make me cringe, I don’t mock him so much anymore. In fact, I don’t mock him at all. I love that he has a clean mouth. I love that he prefers a lady have a clean mouth. (see, it’s not just ladies that need it. Guys should have a clean mouth too.)

Being ladylike is more than dressing the part. It’s acting the part. Walk, talk, act like a lady. Walk, talk, act like a sailor and you won’t keep the best company.

Now one thing I have a hard time with is telling someone to knock it off when they let the manure fall out of there mouths. Boris, dear that he is, gave me some marvelous suggestions, but I’ve yet to try them out. Things from bringing a bottle of dishsoap with me and plunking it down on a counter….. carrying a jar for someone to deposit a dollar for every swear word, and finally kicking said person in the shin every time they swear… until they stop. (as Boris put it, “Yes….. I’m evil.”) Not evil…. Brilliant.

Type in ‘swearing’ into Bing Images and you get an image of Gordon Ramsey. What does that say?

Now all that being said, occasionally I like a swear word or two in a book because it makes the character more real. It’s real to have people swear. We don’t live in an era where people keep the mouth clean……They could, but they don’t. So if you write a character with a super clean mouth, well they are going to be fitting more in Christian publishing.

But at the same time, this is why I love Emilie Loring books. The swear words are dated swear words that don’t mean anything now, or they just aren’t there. So….. to be ladylike? Don’t swear. To write a realistic book? Swear a little, but lets keep the manure in the barn. There’s a reason they call it shoveling shit….

Kate